Calming my Nerves

In mid-February 2019, I jolted off and took a last minute trip across the world to the beautiful country of Panama. I was invited to attend an investor conference by the group putting together the conference, so I was thrilled be part of this opportunity! It was an incredible, life changing experience. Nevermind what happened at the conference, however, that is a story for another article. The main point of this story is that right before my presentation I received a massage. The massage hurt.

Fast forward a month: my thumb, index and middle fingers on my right hand had started to go numb, and I would feel waves of a tingling sensation rush down my right arm as if my arm and fingers were falling asleep. This was a gradual process; only about 2 weeks after my massage did I really start to notice that this numbness was a chronic condition that was getting worse, and it took me another week to correlate the new condition to the massage that I had received.

Before I received my massage, I had this terribly uncomfortable knot right around my right shoulder blade. I told the masseuse to focus on that area to see if he could untangle my knot, and he went to work. Kneading, pressing, pulling, thumping. The man was good. He has strong hands that could actually find the problem areas and he worked through them like a pro. Sometimes he would focus on the area too much or press too hard and it would hurt. “Oh well,” I thought, “this is a deep tissue massage and this pain is part of the gain.”

I left the massage all loosey goosey, happy, and sore. I continued to my presentation where I proceeded to kick ass and take all the names. Handshakes, drinks and winks filled the evening as the net was being worked by everyone there to build business.

A couple days later, I was still sore. I thought nothing of it, as it seemed normal after being worked so hard. I continued thinking nothing of it until I noticed the numbness creep into my fingers. “Shit. This isn’t good. Why is this happening?” It took me a couple days to put together that perhaps the masseuse went too hard. Perhaps he pinched a nerve or an artery slightly enough to cut off feelings and blood flow to my fingers. Slowly, as my blood flow continued to be blocked, my numbness was spreading and becoming more severe until my whole thumb, index and ring fingers were numb, I had constant waves of tingling rushing down my arm as if it was falling asleep, and I couldn’t sleep well because it was beginning to hurt at night. I looked at a diagram of the nerves in the arm and sure enough, the three fingers were connected.

“Nope, forget this.”

I have friends with severe nerve injury; it’s not pretty. In fact it’s quite tragic and I wouldn’t wish that kind of life or pain on anybody or any body part. I wouldn’t let this happen to me.

“I know I can heal myself. If what caused this is a pinched something in my back, all I need to do is un-pinch it, right?” Seems logical.

Stretch

Pushups

Stretch

I get another massage when I am in Spain, one month after the initial massage. I tell the masseuse what happened and where to focus. She is pretty good, but she starts doing the same thing as the other guy did. I recognize at this point and guide her to pull instead of push. To press and hold instead of knead. After 30–45 minutes of us working together and me guiding her how to best alleviate my arm, I re-examine my arm and fingers.

The numbness had left my pointer and middle finger and was now only in the thumb! Progress had been made! I can reverse this!

I have spent the two weeks since I received the latest massage focusing on healing my arm and fingers by stretching, exercising, and consciously directing healing energy from my mind, through my heart, and into my arm by direct prayer and energy manipulation (here I’ve stepped into woo-woo territory, but this stuff is all too real as I am happy to explain in subsequent articles). At this point, all I have remaining is a persistent numb spot on the tip of my thumb, with occasional waves of tingling running down my arm. I would say I am 80% healed from where I was two weeks ago and I have full confidence I can completely reverse the effects to regain full feeling.

Wow. What a powerful experience for me. Let’s extract some lessons from to move forward.

1. I developed a pain in the back. Is that because that was a direct physical manifestation of me becoming a pain in the back? Quite possibly, and this question remains open as food for thought.

2. I went to a professional to have it taken care of. I could have spent the time to stretch, massage myself and alleviate myself of the pain without seeking external help, and in doing so would have avoided this whole incident and instead showed my self some love and attention.

a) Bonus lesson: The initial massage was free so why not enjoy it?! Well, now we can also see that often times, things that are free are overvalued because they can provide negative value instead.

3. The professional was good, but without my guidance he provided more harm than good. This is akin to a doctor prescribing you medicine without knowing your medical history. He can identify your symptoms, but without greater context he is just shooting in the dark. Progressing on your pathway must always be directed by you; professionals serve to accelerate your growth but they cannot grow for you. You are the horse being led to water by the professional; it’s your job to drink.

4. Pay close attention; chronic problems don’t just appear and disappear. They creep into your life so slowly that it’s hard to notice until it becomes painfully apparent, by which point it becomes much more difficult to attend to. If you strengthen your self awareness, you can catch these things very early and weed your garden before the weeds take root.

5. Poco a poco. Little by little. Constant pressure applied relentlessly. This is how you move mountains, or nerves, or anything else you want to change or build. Love is the same way. The grandiose gestures are only that: grandiose. Commitment is consistency is true creation. I am not healing myself by going to one massage. I used that massage as a tool to jump off, but the true healing comes from my daily stretching and focused attention.

6. Focused attention is miraculous. It is literally the power force behind creation and manifestation. I am healing myself because I am focused to do so. It is as simple as that. I wonder what else I can do if I focus my attention…

This experience was a huge lesson for me to pay attention to myself so I can prevent chronic issues from creeping up just because I am too lazy to take care of them. All it takes if a few moments a day to check in with yourself and to weed your garden. It seems so simple because it is. By respecting and revering this simplicity, I have gained the super-power to Calm my own Nerves.

Thank you for reading! Do you resonate with the lessons from my experiences? Do you have any of your own to share? Please let me know your thoughts in the comments below!